First page of Paisley Partridge and the Case of the Disappearing Little Penguins...

 Chapter One

“It’s one thing to slide tackle your teacher but it goes up a whole new level when she happens to be a flesh-eating zombie.”

My best friend Connor O’Neal is telling me his dream - second by boring second - as we walk to school on our first day of our grade five year.

If I hear one more word about zombie-teachers, I’ll scream so I change the subject.

“I wonder if we will be in the same class again?”

Connor shuffles nervously beside me. I know he’ll be chewing the inside of his lip. I don’t even need to look at him. We’ve been friends since Kinder. He has no secrets from me.

“Hope so Paisley. There’s no way I’ll get through Maths without you.”

I notice his mouth droop for a moment, then like the sun peeking out through storm clouds, his face brightens.

“Do you want to know what happened next?”

Truthfully, I don’t but I can’t hurt his feelings. My mind is on the most important question of the day - who will be my teacher?

Connor goes on to recount a gruesome battle between the Grade Six Shearwater Bay Soccer team and the ZombieTeachers with garlic-onion breath. It involves exploding soccer balls, teachers firing rubber missiles from staple guns and a lot of yelling and running around. I’m not listening to the detail. I’m thinking. It’s the thing I do best. And analyzing.

I know I’ll be in Mr. Perkins’ class because he always teaches the gifted students. Mr. Perkins is youngish for a teacher, probably about 30 and loves Science and Maths, my favourite subjects. I’ll be the 2IC (second in charge) in 5/6P. Paisley Partridge in 5/6P. Perfect. And although I’m in Grade 5, I know he’ll be putting me to work with the sixes or he might need to look at the grade 7 curriculum.